You know how "The song remembers when"? Well, the smell does too. Murphy's oil always takes me back to the same place. As I close my eyes in the now, I imagine I am fifteen and am cleaning tack...saddles, bridles, hackamores. I can almost feel them in my hands. I am at Johnson's Riding Farm and I am getting Cricket ready to go gallop into the high fields. There is no greater pleasure in my life than flying through the woods and jumping everything in site on horse back.
Jolting myself back to reality, because this house isn't going to clean itself, I am almost sad. Why, I ask myself why did you ever stop riding?
Myself can't answer that. I suppose it was a combination of boys, needing to see the world and money. Horses are expensive. And I'll be honest, with the anxiety issues I have now I would be petrified to jump even the smallest stick while on a horses back. I'd sit there and analyze the fifty things that could go wrong and then put myself right into rapid heart beat. Yup, gotta love anxiety.
I have heard all these things about moving, such as "we didn't know how much crap we had..." or "living out of boxes" or "don't wait until you are moving to paint and replace the carpet, you'll be pissed your doing all this work for someone else to enjoy." I get ALL of these. Our rooms look huge without so much 'crap' in them. And I am currently sleeping on my mattress in the living room and all of our clothes are in bins in there as all the furniture is out of the house. I have pretty much painted three bedrooms, ceiling, walls and trim solely. I have also had to paint some downstairs. That being said, I am absolutely thrilled my career choice was not house painter. Dude, that job sucks. My back is glad I am not a furniture mover. It is screaming for Advil right now.
I am far too pretty to have to work this hard. I am constantly sobbing that in my mind.
So here's my advice about moving. Marry rich and hire people to do it for you. Now, since that is not the case with me I am keeping a positive attitude (most of the time) and keeping my "Eye on the prize" (thanks Holly).
After all, if dreams were easy to reach - everyone would be doing it. Hard work never hurt anyone. Well, accept maybe the wrist of a painter and the back of a mover.
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